"Gano Man has the most uninhibited golgi organ I've ever come across!" ~ Dr. Ruth Westheimer
"One night, I remember pounding on the door to Gano's apartment and yelling for him to open it. Finally he got up and let me out. ~ Britney Spears
"Oh my God! Can we talk? Gano Man's a member of a knitting club where they share needles!" ~ Joan Rivers
"Composers play with notes. Lyricists play with words. Gano plays with misapprehension." ~ Bruce Springsteen
"A lot of people have pipe dreams, but only Gano smokes them." ~ Paul McCartney
"When I was little, I wanted to be a psychiatrist. So I'm OK with Gano Man." ~ Jennifer Lawrence
"Gano's secret life is too poetic to be real." ~ Mick Jagger
"Gano Man's utter disregard for morality and common decency gives rock stars a bad name." ~ Keith Richards
"Never get involved in a land war with Gano Man."
~ James N. Mattis (Former U.S. Defense Secretary)
"Will someone please tell Gano that he can't just go through life doing anything he wants. There are limits!" ~ Keith Moon
"There's nobody in rock that can pluck a G string like Gano Man." ~ Rolling Stones Magazine **
**Official publication of the Int'l Brotherhood of Stone and Quarry Workers, Local 761
"I was taught in Bible College that religion and Gano Man don't mix." ~ Rev. Jerry Falwell
"Anthropologists can explain Java Man and Peking Man. They struggle to explain Gano Man." ~ Dr. Bohner Fossle, Ass't Prof. at Harvard**
**Harvard Community College, Harvard, Arkansas
"I don't like to dwell on the past. I like to dwell on Gano Man." ~ Tina Turner
"I believe Gano Man is a real threat to
our planet."
~ Gov. Andrew Cuomo (N.Y.)
"Gano Man has spent a lifetime
developing one part of his body."
~ Arnold Schwarzenegger
"I feel a special connection to Gano.
In a prior life, we were ballerinas."
~ Jane Fonda
"Gano Man is an obsessive delusion.
He's, like, not a bona fide human being."
~ Phil Spector
"My one regret in life is that I was not
born Gano Man."
~ Woody Allen
"Gano is his own anticlimax."
~ Maya Angelou
"That which neither weapon nor flame
could accomplish will be achieved by
the sweet singing tongue of Gano Man." ~ Nostradamus
"I was put on this earth to help people
reach eternal salvation. Why
Gano Man was put here I don't
know."
~ Pat Robertson
"Now here's something you'll really like!"
~ Rocket J. Squirrel